I created this website to help adults with newly-diagnosed ADHD take charge of their lives.
But it turns out that a lot of what is good for ADHD is good for neurotypical people too!
We all need to:
- Heal from the past
- Let go of shame
- Learn self-mastery
So whether you want to optimize your whole life or make some tweaks around the edges, you’re in the right place!
As you begin your exploration, there are some things you should know.
What You Need to Know About Advice
Advice is an opinion on what could or should be done.
Put all things to the test; keep what is good.
What You Need to Know About Me
I do not have the answer for you. I believe I can help by sharing something that worked for me, and then prompting the you to think about yourself.
I am one beggar showing another beggar where I found some bread.
What You Need to Know About Yourself
YOU are the expert on your life, your needs, and your functioning.
How to Use This Website
Give Yourself Permission
You Have Permission To Ignore What Doesn’t Work
…or isn’t interesting or inspiring.
Ideas are for inspiration, not obligation.
Techniques and concepts are malleable; they can and should be transformed to fit what you need at the time.
My goal is to prompt you to think about your life and take action steps that make sense to you.
You Have Permission To Stop When You Feel Overwhelmed
Pay attention to how your body and spirit feel. Are you breathing fast? Not breathing at all? Is your chest tight? Stomach sinking? Head buzzing?
Sensations like these can be a signal that you need a break. What works for me: closing my eyes and breathing deeply, or taking a walk outside.
When your body doesn’t feel good: stop, and do something else.
You Have Permission To Do One Thing At A Time
A new ADHD diagnosis can make you feel like you need to make up for lost time. Understandable.
If working on many things at once makes you feel good or you see progress, that is great! Keep doing it!
But if trying to fix everything in your life makes you feel panicked, afraid, ashamed, angry, or immobilized, you have my permission to do only 1 thing at a time. You can give yourself the same permission.
(And taking a break from self-improvement counts as doing 1 thing!)
You Have Permission To Try
You are allowed to try something and not like it.
You Have Permission To Fail
You are allowed to fail. You are allowed to compartmentalize failure. You are allowed to refuse to let 1 mess-up be a reflection on your entire body of work, your worth, or your moral standing.
You Have Permission To Make Your Own Definitions
You are allowed to define what effort, success, failure, requirements, productivity, organization, rest, and deserving mean to you.
The Blog
Blog posts are grouped into three main categories:
Managing Yourself is about learning your internal settings and choosing your external behavior. This category has topics like healing from your past, letting go of shame, and learning how to figure out and use your individual strengths.
Dealing With Others is about your one-to-one interactions with individuals. This category has topics like communicating clearly, giving feedback, and disagreeing well.
Being Part of the World is about showing up and being part of something broader. Attending an event in your community, registering to vote, and listening to a song someone else wrote are all ways to “be part of the world.”